Tag Archives: funny

Don’t Share Your Donuts with Roaches

Jelly Donut BiteIt was a typical quiet Saturday morning; sleeping in and staying in my pajamas until about noon. I was enjoying the morning sports page as I finished my breakfast of coffee, and my favorite… A cream filled donut.

Only this Sunday was a little different. I reach down for my donut, only to find that it had disappeared.

Who stole my donut!?!

My first suspect was my wife, since she had been on a diet for the last few weeks, and nobody has that much will-power to turn down such a delectable pastry. After asking her, she denied indulging.

It’s about this time I remembered I had the nanny camera hidden in the kitchen and I could have video proof of who the donut thief was.

Here’s the footage:

Just then I remembered my nanny cam! I took a peek at the footage and quickly found out who the culprit was. Witness for yourself:

It was a roach!

I’m sick and tired of these dang roaches! It’s bad enough that every time I turn on the lights in the kitchen, I see a few of these guys scurry off into the deepest corners of my kitchen. Now these buggers are stealing my food, and not the brussels sprouts or lima beans. There stealing my donuts!

I’ve had enough! I’m calling a cockroach exterminator, and not just any exterminator; I want the best Atlanta has to offer. I want an exterminator who offers a guarantee when it comes to keeping my home and my kitchen free from these filthy pests. I want the roaches in my home not only gone, I don’t want any of their family returning to steal my pop-tarts, my cheese danishes, or my blueberry muffins.

I want the best Atlanta exterminator!

Best Atlanta Exterminators

Bulwark Exterminating
5221 Palmero Court #105
Buford, GA 30518
(770) 904-4141
bulwarkpestcontrol.com  
Dixie Wildlife Control
893 Church Street
Marietta, GA 30060
(770) 424-1300
dixiewildlifecontrol.com  
Critter Patrol
6300 Powers Ferry Road Northwest #600
Atlanta, GA 30339
(770) 445-0949
critterpatrol.com

Four Movies About Monster Mosquitos

Mosquitos are more than disgusting critters – they can be dangerous too. According to the silver screen, mosquitos aren’t just cause for worry because of West Nile Virus – they are also deadly, vengeful killers when they grow big enough! Killer insects have long been a popular theme in Hollywood B-flicks, and mosquitos are no exception. Below is a list of four movies starring killer mosquitos that are sure to make your skin itch!

1. Mansquito

Mansquito

Mansquito (Photo credit: Wikipedia) 

Also known as Mosquito Man, this 2005 flick follows the story of a convicted murderer who mutates into a disgusting half-man, half-mosquito after a DNA experiment with a hot babe scientist goes bad. The “mansquito” goes on a killing spree which leaves his victims drained of blood, and soon the gorgeous scientist finds herself transforming into a mutant mosquito as well! But can the scientists’ boyfriend-the-cop stop them before it’s too late?

2. Mosquito

Blood Fever

Blood Fever (Photo credit: Wikipedia) 

When an alien spaceship crashes into a swamp in the middle of a national park, mosquitos mutate into the size of vultures after feeding on the alien corpses. These new, humongous, mutant mosquitos are hungry – very hungry – and start feeding on every human being they come across. Also known as Blood Fever, this flick was released in 1995 with the tagline “Million years of evolution have just become mankind’s worse nightmare.” It is unintentionally hilarious, and definitely worth a watch if you enjoy movies that are so bad, they’re good.

3. Skeeter

Skeeter (1993)

Illegal toxic waste dumping in a desert town results in a swarm of deadly, mutant mosquitos – very rubbery looking, bat-sized mosquitos that are intent on draining the locals of all their blood! Starring Tracy Griffith, Jim Youngs, and Charles Napier, this straight-to-video flick was released in 1993 and is billed as a horrifying sci-fi thriller.

4. Sucker

Sucker Movie

Source: scifi-movies.com 

Sucker is another film about a man being unintentionally mutated into half-man, half-mosquito and suddenly being hell-bent on revenge. The main character in this flick worked for years at a nuclear power plant, and when he’s abducted by an evil scientist who wants to test a vaccine against a deadly mosquito virus, the rabid mosquito DNA fuses with his own and he transforms into a blood-thirsty mutant. Released in 2013, this film is the most recent in monster mosquito flicks.

As you can see, mosquitos are more than disease-carrying bloodsuckers – they’re literal killers, too – at least in the cinema, anyway. Whether it’s men being mutated into half-human/half-mosquito or gigantic alien bloodsuckers, mosquitos are truly horrifying on screen and off. In fact, it’s best to call a pest control professional if you see any of these bloodsuckers buzzing around, just to be safe – you don’t want them mutating into monstrous killers, after all!

About the author: Chris is a blogger for a New Jersey pest control company. He used to enjoy horror flicks, including cheesy B films, when he was young but no longer has a stomach for them.

Published by Thomas Ballantyne

Valentine’s Day Roaches- A Bad Idea

Valentine's day.

Valentine’s day. (Photo credit: MalinStrandvall)

Valentine’s Day Roaches- A Bad Idea

This Valentine’s Day, you better pull out all the stops to impress your significant other. There’s no excuse this year! Show her just how much she is loved.

Get her some beautiful red roses, a box of decadent chocolates, and take her out to a nice restaurant. Bring your date back to your candlelit place and have some romantic music playing. Have some champagne on ice; to go along with your strawberries.

After you pull out all the stops, make sure your overtures are not nullified by a disgusting cockroach. I know pest control is not all that romantic, but a cockroach encounter will pull the romance out of an otherwise perfect evening.

Take A Look:

Cockroaches

The cooler Georgia months, like February, draw cockroaches inside. These disease ridden pests enter, looking for shelter from the cold weather. Cockroaches are scavengers that feed on decaying organic material, and are particularly fond of rotten food. They have even been known to eat fingernails, human hair, and dog droppings. Roaches are most commonly found in kitchens, basements, and the crevices of porches; but a few can find their way into your bathtub.

CBS Anchor Gives Bulwark Some Valentine’s Day Love

JaQuitta Williams of CBS Atlanta sent Bulwark Exterminating an email, thanking the company for the flowers that were sent to her as a Valentine. She even saw the above Valentine’s roach video, and said it to be “cute.”

What were your thoughts on the video?

 

Roach Control Atlanta

Bulwark Exterminating
5221 Palmero Court #105
Buford, GA 30518
(770) 904-4141
bulwarkpestcontrol.com

Orkin Pest & Termite Control
1935 Cliff Valley Way NE #118
Atlanta, GA 30329
(866) 713-9979
orkin.com

 

The Top 5 Reasons You Need Pest Control

Roach

Roach (Photo credit: Are W)

5. The Previous Owners Just Won’t Move Out

Has this happened to you? You’ve just bought a house and are getting ready to make a home. You start carrying boxes down to the basement and find that a large family of rats has already laid their claim. They look at you with their beady black eyes and you know it’s them or you. Don’t want to get your hands dirty making them move on? Then you need to get some Denver pest control.

4. There Are More Occupants When The Lights Are Out

It’s the middle of the night and you wake up with a serious case of the munchies. You go to the kitchen, turn on the lights, and you see a legion of the most unwelcome guests in nature making a break for the nearest hidden crack in the floor. Roaches; you need them gone.

Now, you can buy some worthless cockroach traps that never work, or you can get some professional Denver pest control. It’s your choice. Don’t let them ruin your midnight feasting ever again.

3. That Wooden Fence Just Isn’t As Strong As It Used To Be

I remember when I was playing once in my family’s yard in Littleton, Co. The sun was out, the grass was fresh and I was running around with our German shepherd, Buster. When I needed to catch my breath, I sat against the fence and heard a loud crack as I put my weight against it and fell through the fence. Was I really that fat? No, it was termites. Our fence was infested with a blight of wood eaters. After that incident my parents had a Denver pest control company on speed dial.

2. The Cupboards Are Occupied By A Relentless Force of Sugar Thieves

Have you ever fought a losing battle against a relentless force that outnumbered you? No? I have. I moved into an apartment and everything was great, until one day I came home and everywhere I looked, my gaze was greeted by a mass of tiny black bodies, ravishing my food and taking it to their colonies hidden in my floor. Ants. They acted like they owned the place. It got so bad that I kept nearly all of my food in the fridge. I tried to fight them with traps and poisons, but I was vastly outnumbered. Instead of getting Denver pest control, I chose to fight a losing battle. I still have flashbacks.

1.  You’re Allergic To Nature’s Rat Catcher

Cats. Love them, or hate them, they’re pretty much here to stay. However, not everyone can use nature’s lovable little hunters to keep their homes clean, and sometimes there’s just too much for a cat to do. How do you handle this problem? No, not dogs. They’ve got their good points, but dogs are pretty much useless for taking out rats and other vermin. Get your cat some help and bring in some Denver pest control.

By Andrew Whittaker

Andrew graduated from Utah Valley University in December of 2010 with a Bachelors of Arts in Creative Writing. He writes blog posts about pests and how to deal with them. When not writing blog posts, he enjoys writing fantasy and science fiction.

Crazy “Princess”

Copyright ? 2010 Pest-Control-Stories. Visit the original article at http://blogpestcontrol.com/2010/01/crazy-princess/.As a technician in San Antonio, Texas you see a lot of different things, meet a lot of people & enter some interesting houses.  As usual, on one of our hot summer days, I stopped by a customer’s home that was on my route for a

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Crazy “Princess”

Lint Bugs

Copyright ? 2010 Pest-Control-Stories. Visit the original article at http://blogpestcontrol.com/2010/01/lint-bugs/.We had a gentleman call for a service quote, and said he had tiny white bugs biting him.  He said they were jumping all over his house and he had bites all over his ankles and legs.

Continued here:
Lint Bugs

steak removal

Copyright ? 2010 Pest-Control-Stories.

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steak removal

Lost dog

Copyright ? 2010 Pest-Control-Stories. Visit the original article at http://blogpestcontrol.com/2010/01/pest-control-dogs/.During one hot summer in Austin, I was performing first time services for new Bulwark customers and training a new technician.  It was getting late in the week and the two of us had performed several first time services, so I told the trainee to get

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Lost dog

Time Out

Have you ever tried to talk a woman out of Pest Control? There are certain things that you should just pamper your wife with, and pest control may fall into that category.

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Time Out

Roving packs of dogs

It was a typical hot, humid Texas Summer day. I had completed most of my schedule and I was getting into the stretch where every customer is home and needs just a little special attention to feel comfortable that their bugs will be gone.

Originally posted here:
Roving packs of dogs